mb3

im starting to realize ive given up on a lot of things in my life, quite a few of them more than once. im really starting to regret this habit. theres certain people in my life that i miss, and others that im starting to miss. sometimes i feel like im slipping away from certain people. im tired of losing parts of my life. i dont want to lose anymore.

posted by mike @ 2:13 AM 13 comments

its been so long since ive posted in this. i dont know why ive decided to post now, of all times. i feel like complete shit, both emotionally and physically. theres not really any positive aspects of my life right now, with one small exception, but thats a bit out of reach at the moment. i feel cold and numb. ive recently discovered that i might have a few sleeping disorders. i dont really have any motivation or ambition in life. im lazy and apathetic most of the time. i dont do much anymore. on the occassions that i do get out, its always the same repetitive bullshit, over and over again. i might as well just lay in bed and never leave my room. as usual, im doing terrible in school. i really dont want to go next semester. i need to sort my life out. ive recently turned 20, but i still havent grown up. there are things wrong with me that i need to fix. i dont know what to do, or where to begin. im so lost and confused, and i hate it. fuck this.

sound://elliott smith - everything means nothing to me

posted by mike @ 3:55 PM 1 comments

theres not a whole lot to update about. my summers been alright so far. i got some new shirts: led zeppelin, sublime, and mikes company, alastor. ive been skating again lately too, which is cool. ive also been enjoying my job at the paintball park. speaking of which, ive got to get up for work in about 6 hours, so im off to bed. goodnight.

sound://atreyu - the crimson

posted by mike @ 12:25 AM 1 comments

today was my last day of school. freedom at last! so fucking awesome.

sound://paulson - nightfall

posted by mike @ 9:20 PM 0 comments

i work at the paintball park now. i worked yesterday and today and made $160. im so stoked. its a pretty basic job, and the people i work with are way chill. its definitely an awesome job. most people hate their first jobs, but i got lucky, cause i love mine. im gonna work every weekend from now on, if possible. ryan said he works just about every weekend, so ill probably working whenever he does.

sound://soul position - one love

posted by mike @ 9:43 PM 0 comments

i think im gonna get dropped from my math class. i missed the dead line for the chapter 4 test today. i thought that the math lab closed at 8pm, like it does monday through thursday, but i guess i had forgotten that it closes on 3pm on fridays. so yeah, im screwed. i can sign up for the class again, so its kinda like just a first warning or something, but hopefully i dont have to pay for the course credits all over again. if so, ill be able to pay for it myself though, cause im working at the paintball park tomorrow and hopefully sunday, if theres open spots. ryans on his way to pick me up right now. i think im going with him and billy to inner world to get a bong. im not smoking, im just bored and not doing anything other than posting right now, so i might as well go along for the ride.

sound://caliban - always following life

posted by mike @ 5:16 PM 1 comments

new template. oohh la la.

i watched shawshank redemption earlier. im doing some extra credit on it in sociology. it was kind of the second time ive seen it, but the first time i didnt see the beginning, so i guess its the first time i saw the whole movie. after seeing it again though, ive decided it is now added to my growing list of favorite movies.

sound://karate - baby teeth

posted by mike @ 1:10 AM 2 comments

im such an asshole. im sorry :(

posted by mike @ 2:30 PM 0 comments

the results from my inkblot test:

Mike, your subconscious mind is driven most by Curiosity.

You are full of questions about life, people, and your own potential. You spend more time than others imagining the possibilities for your life — and you're open to things others are too afraid to consider.

You have an almost physical need to know and do more. It's only through new experiences that you feel a greater understanding of yourself and the world. You also have a rebellious streak that shows up when you feel unable to truly influence the world or circumstances around you. Your appetite for novel experiences also shows an openness others don't have, but wish they did.

Your psyche is very rich; the more you learn about it, the more you will understand who you really are.

deep.

posted by mike @ 1:28 AM 0 comments

the past few days have been pretty cool. yesterday i got two new pairs of etnies shoes for $80. no, not $80 for each pair, $80 for both, so technically it was like they were $40 each. thats a pretty good deal if you ask me, although i know certain people who think thats too expensive. well i say they are cheapskates! yeah, you know who you are. also, i got 2 shirts for $20, which was another pretty good deal. then last night i saw kill bill 2 with nolan. yeah, i think the number of the day yesterday was 2. haha. anyway, kill bill 2 was awesome. go see it. then today nolans dad took us to eat sushi at this place by the new theater. it was good. after that we went and saw the punisher. that movie fucking ruuuuled. it was by far one of the best, if not the best, comic-based movie released yet. i loved it, and might even go see it again sometime since i didnt have to pay for my ticket this time. and to finish it off we got ice cream at cold stone afterwards. yum yum. and to think my weekend isnt even over yet. hopefully tomorrow will kick ass as well.

sound://dimension zero - this light

posted by mike @ 10:36 PM 0 comments

i couldnt sleep, so i watched 12 monkeys. great movie. if you havent seen it, go rent it or something.

posted by mike @ 4:08 AM 0 comments

well the shit has hit the fan. i got a letter in the mail today saying im on academic probation. if i dont pull some good grades out of my ass within the next 6 weeks then im basically kicked out of school for a year. thats right, i might be getting kicked out of a community college. boy do i suck. and on top of that, i also got a bunch of doctor bills from the car wreck in january, and i either have to come up with a few grand to pay them or sue travis' insurance company. life sucks again. ill post more details later.

sound://isis - celestial (the tower)

posted by mike @ 5:00 PM 0 comments

im sick. it sucks a lot. i feel like crap. make it go away.

sound://a silver mt. zion - broken chord can sing a little

posted by mike @ 4:51 PM 0 comments

i guess its time i finally update this thing. spring break is over, and im back in school. that sucks. i have a midterm tomorrow in psychology that i didnt study for. its alright, class isnt till 3 so ill have time tomorrow to study. my life hasnt really been too eventful lately. i could post about some of the little daily bullshit, but im too lazy to type out a lot right now. im hungry. time to go stuff my fat face.

posted by mike @ 11:59 PM 0 comments

sometimes life is so frustrating. i want something so bad im willing to kill for it. im willing to die for it. but i cant have it.

but i will. some day.

posted by mike @ 12:57 AM 0 comments

for some reason, i cant help but feel like i should update this thing more often. oh well. hmm...where to start. well my school schedule turned out different than i expected. i was reading the class catalogue wrong, so what i had thought was a late start english class really wasnt a late start class at all, which meant i wasnt going to be able to get into it. so instead, i did what travis did, and signed up for one of the open entry math classes. basically i go to the library whenever i want, clock in for a while, and leave whenever i want. i have to put in at least 4 hours a week (which isnt hard at all) and take chapter tests by certain deadlines. so even though i usually hate math and suck at it, this class might not be that bad. its self paced, which is ideal for my lazy ass.

in music related news, the sage francis show is coming up soon. im not sure if ive even posted about that yet in here. anyway, me and billy already have our tickets. i also recently found out about the coachella music festival which is being held on may 1st and 2nd. i about pissed my pants when i saw the lineup of bands they have. click that link and youll see what i mean. so again, i asked billy if he wanted to go, and he was down, so i talked to my mom about it. i havent gotten a definite "yes" yet, since the tickets are $140, but im pretty sure with enough ass kissing, ill be able go to. it sounds expensive, but $140 for a two day festival with bands including the cure, the pixies, radiohead, sparta, and the flaming lips, among many many others, its definitely well worth it. and lastly, the modest mouse show is coming up in march, and i think i might even be able to go to that as well, if i can find a ride there.

and finally, happy valentines day. a special "tiamo" goes out to naomi. <3

sound://modest mouse - truckers atlas

posted by mike @ 8:53 PM 0 comments

hmm. not much is new. i got into all my classes, luckily. i almost didnt get into my psychology 101 class. i was the last person allowed in. travis is in the class with me, which is cool. finally i have someone to talk to when i go to school. i still gotta sign up for that late start english class though. even that one was already filled up last week when i was signing up for my other classes, so i gotta wait till next week i think to get the teachers signature to add since its a late start class.

i also finally got my social security card fixed. hooray, i legally exist now! i think im going to the DMV tomorrow to get a california ID so i can get into the sage francis show at canes. its a bar, so i guess its only 18 and up. man i cant wait for that show. its gonna be so awesome. theres a few other shows coming up that id like to go to, but im sure yet. the plot to blow up the eiffel tower is playing pretty soon at che, the locust and dillinger escape plan are playing at epicenter later this month too, and i think modest mouse is even gonna be in san diego not far from now. id like to go to all the shows, but i seriously doubt id be able to make it to them all, so im just worrying about the sage show right now. the modest mouse show would definitely be awesome to see too though. maybe ill save up for that one also. wish me luck.

sound://mars volta - haunt of the roulette dares

posted by mike @ 9:21 PM 0 comments

well i finally have my class schedule figured out. but now i have to see if i can actually get into all the classes i have picked out. everythings full, so im crashing all my classes. i got into philosophy today which was a relief. hopefully the other classes will be just as easy to get into. this semester might be a pretty busy one since im taking philosophy, sociology, psychology 101 (second semester), and english to top it all off.

i also hung out with nolan. we went to the mall and i got the new galactic cd. its great. stop reading and go get it. ha, who am i kidding? no one reads this thing. anyway...then we went back to his house and burned some cds. he burned me the sparta cd and alexisonfire cd, both of which are also great. hes also burning me the requiem for a dream soundtrack and the mars volta cd. yep. tons of great music. oh joy! how i love music.

oh yeah...nolan also almost rear ended someone, and then later almost got his ass kicked by some jarhead he was making faces at while we were on the way to the mall. of course this is normal for nolan and his driving habits. and to think i got in a wreck with travis and not nolan. anyway...then when we were at his house, a telemarketer called and he started hitting on her and was making up all this bullshit about him being 20 and owning a part of some comic company. by the end of the conversation she asked for his email. haha what a pimp.

good times. good times.

sound://alexisonfire - pulmonary archery

posted by mike @ 12:30 AM 0 comments

havent updated in a while. i had band practice with nolan and travis the other day. that was cool. i think i might actually start getting into keyboard. its pretty fun. i think im signing up for classes tomorrow. i still dont even have my schedule picked out yet though, i gotta do that before i go to bed tonight. fucking procrastination and laziness.

also, im really getting into underground hip hop. i think ive found my next music phase. im so addicted to sage francis right now its not even funny. the sick of waiting tables album is so good. i cant wait to get the rest of the sick of series.

eh...im kinda tired and in a bad mood. just one of those blah days i guess. music is my savior.

sound://non-prophets - hope album

posted by mike @ 9:00 PM 0 comments

todays my grandmas birthday. rest in peace grandma. we miss you.

posted by mike @ 10:07 PM 0 comments

so far, 2004 has totally fucking sucked. especially today. my grandma passed away this morning and i was in a head on car collision with travis earlier. january 4th is now officially "life sucks day."

fuck you 2004. fuck you in the face.

posted by mike @ 11:03 PM 0 comments

i had a dream that i could fly. man it felt so real. it was absolutely amazing. i wish that dream would come true.

sound://pinback - montaigne

posted by mike @ 6:43 PM 0 comments

i have a newfound addiction for french vanilla coffee. that and pumpkin spice coffee, but i only get that when i got to am/pm with nolan. im now finished with my first semester of college. christmas is approaching and the years almost over. maybe its time to reflect on whats happened to me in these past 12 months...nah. ill save that for later. ha.

sound://karate - new martini

posted by mike @ 11:44 PM 0 comments

well i had my last class of motion graphics. i got a B. rock on. now ive just gotta take my final in psychology on thursday and im done with my first semester of college. wow that went by fast.

sound://blindsight - black days

posted by mike @ 1:07 AM 0 comments

its almost 4 am. i cant sleep. had too much coffee. whee! its time to dance!

sound://outkast - hey ya

posted by mike @ 3:53 AM 0 comments